Dear Auntie,
My husband is very proud of his body and never misses an opportunity to strip and show off as much as is decently possible. My family and friends tease me and my girlfriends are always telling me how lucky I am. This is all very well, but I want him to keep his charms for me and me alone! What can I do?
Vera, Cheshire

On one hand, Vera, your friends could be right. If your bloke's sexy as, be glad of it! As long as his main "Charm" (his cock, of course!) is yours and yours alone then fair enough. However, there could be a number of real issues going on behind his exhibitionism. For example, he could, in reality, harbour deep insecurities about his intellect, perhaps because you're cleverer than him, and his only way to deal with the conversation getting a little over his head is to divert peoples attention off politics and onto his pecs. Or, he could be hedging his bets and making sure that should you and he ever have a fall-out, or you're on the rag, your friends will be more than willing to offer him a shoulder to "cry" on. Whatever the cause of his behaviour though, there's a tried and tested method to nip it in the bud that I learned off my ex-husband. You must gradually start eating away at his self-esteem. That's right. When I married, I was slim, clever, personable, great in the sack and cooked like a domestic Goddess. Fortunately I had him to keep me right by undermining my career ("I could do that, and better"),  my friendships ("they don't really like you"), my hobbies ("I've shat better") and so on, until I actually doubted myself BIG time. If you adopt this approach, he'll soon be eaten up with self-doubt and, hey Presto!, he won't be able to go out without sedatives, let alone his shirt! Good luck girlfriend!
Auntie